Why I Don’t Homeschool

I know quite a few people who homeschool. This post isn't about the merits of homeschooling, or in opposition to homeschooling. It's never been something I have considered, but I did think of a list of reasons why it wouldn't be a good idea for me to do.

1. History lessons would consist of letting H watch the History Channel. Since they are now showing shows about loggers and theoretical scenarios involving life after people, I'm not sure how much history H would learn.
   
2. I have been consistently inconsistent with making sure H completes/does her homework for preschool. Pretty certain that doesn't bode well for the possibility of me being her teacher.
   
3. International studies would be completed by watching Ninja Warrior episodes on G4. Hey, it happens in Japan.
   
4. In an ongoing theme, home economics would be taught by Project Runway and Iron Chef America. Why do it yourself when you can get the experts to do it for you? Of course, H tends to critic my plating skills after watching Iron Chef, so maybe that would be a bad idea.
   
5. I suck at math. I really suck at math. I am in no way qualified to teach H math. Excel, yes. Quicken, yes. Budgeting, sort of. But math other than counting? Not so much.
   
6. H and I need a break from each other, otherwise we start to fight. If we were together all the time and I had to teach her school stuff, in addition to all the life skills stuff, I think we would go insane. As it is by the time Brent gets home on Friday night after being gone all week, we're ready to be separated.
   
7. Since I don't really like people, H would be too isolated here at home. The only way she's going to make friends is if she goes somewhere that has a lot of kids her age.
   
8. I really like to buy back to school supplies, and what is the point of buying a princess backpack and lunch box if you don't leave the house?
   
9. Our field trips would consist of going to Wal-Mart to buy groceries. Not too fun, and not too educational, especially considering that sometimes we do fake fighting when we're at the store.
   
10. We have lots of art supplies and crafts, but I am not artistic at all and should not be the one teaching H craft skills.
    
11. H already has awesome computer skills, and can beat older kids at Mario Kart. So the exorbitant amount of time she spends with electronic devices needs to be drastically reduced. Since our house is full of said devices, and people who are always using them, school seems a better bet.
    
12. I am not an athletic person. Exercise around here consists of P90x, which while awesome, is not exactly designed for 4-year-olds. H loves to go to the playground, and I would love for her to go and for me to stay home. Recess anyone?
    
13. Lunch around here is almost always quesadillas. If I get her a lunch pass, that's one more meal I don't have to prepare.
    
14. I bought a whole bunch of supplemental learning supplies to help H learn the alphabet and numbers and colors. The majority of them are still sitting in a pile, since she doesn't really want to go through them, and I don't really want to push her. 'Cause I'm lazy.
    

    
     

    So there you have it. I'm a slacker, but I own it. So as I prepare to throw H on the mercy of the public school system, I hope it works out for her. Because I don't have a backup plan.